Sunday, October 12, 2008

Nest


Last night we shared an evening with old friends. We met in our late twenties, lived next door to each other when our kids were quite little. My friend often says that "we grew up together." We used to get together on weekends and play Trivial Persuit, Taboo, and other quirky board games, as well as watching the big game on TV and sharing the barbecue. Our husbands coached soccer and we (the ladies) taught cross-stitch classes at the elementary school and did our part as Girl Scout leaders. That whole time frame seems like eons ago. They're our age, but already empty nesters. One kid has his career and the other is on her own, away at college. Their house was so clean because the kids weren't there, and their dog is now the little king. The dog is a silky terrier that probably weighs three pounds on a good day. I love my kids dearly but I keep wondering when they're going to be on their own. With the crummy economy these days, I wonder if they'll ever get out on their own in this area, or even this state. Both of my kids do their part to chip in at home, but I would really like to see them fully on their own. I don't know if my friends are the exception or the rule, but I've met others who have their twenty-something kids still living at home because it's too expensive to move out. Our friends reminded us that, sometimes, their kids come home, not because they miss their parents terribly, but because they need cash... cash and clean laundry. *sigh*

Friday's song:
On A Clear Day - Barbara Streisand - Heffer Blog

PEACE

Photo from Wikipedia

4 comments:

AKA Alice said...

Yeah...my kids are still too young, but I share your concerns. Right now I'm hoping that by the time they get to college, that their college funds are built back up...they're taking a beating like everything else right now...For later on I wonder/worry about whether or not they'll be able to stay in SoCal with the price of everything.

BTW...I'll also be doing the Shelter Island 5K next month. We'll make a plan to meet up.

Flo said...

Here in Hawaii it really is the norm for kids to stay at home. Almost everyone I know is either living with their parents or has their kids living with them. They build huge additions on their homes and the extended family all live together. Some even have grandparents living there too, so there's 3 or 4 generations in a home. I will say, the empty nest was an adjustment but I've grown accustom to it and it is nice to see my daughter independent and living her own life.

Anne said...

I wonder the same thing. It's a very different mentality, if my co-workers in their 20s are any indication. It could be San Diego, because it's so pricey, but they all go home and feel no impulse to move out until -- get this -- they have enough to buy a home. I guess renting is beneath them! Maybe the economy will change that too.

Irene said...

AKA Alice,
A lot of our friends have moved away because California was just too expensive. I really would like my kids to be in the area, but if they can't, I would totally understand. I'd miss them like crazy, though.

Flo,
It's getting that way here, too. Our next door neighbors built on to their house and added another actual house on their lot to accommodate their extended family. We even discussed building a small house for my dad at the end of our lot. Perhaps that will be the trend.

Anne,
After my BIL got divorced, he moved back home with his folks, and he's in his 50s... He had to deal with the divorce then find a place to live. I really want my kids to be more independent. I sort of feel like we're hindering that independence, in a way, but it really is expensive to live here. I hope the economy turns around.